


i don't care about the repercussions

by darkrosemind



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Coming Out, Emotions, F/F, F/M, Family, Feelings, Gen, Love, Support, The Squad, bi tag, happiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-13 00:03:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16881804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkrosemind/pseuds/darkrosemind
Summary: Rosa Diaz is a mysterious, strong, badass, bisexual, independent woman.And nothing at all can ever change that.





	i don't care about the repercussions

**Author's Note:**

> the title is lyrics from 'repercussions' by bea miller.  
> enjoy!!

Her name is Rosa Diaz.

She is a strong, badass, independent woman.

No matter what.

And she's bisexual. She's known that for almost her entire life. It isn't supposed to change anything whatsoever. She's attracted to men and women, but she's still Rosa Diaz. But since then, so much had changed. Since Charles found out, Rosa was living on the verge of a panic.

 _You have to be yourself. You have to be Rosa Diaz_ , she constantly tells herself. She's dating a woman, but that fact changes nothing about her.

And maybe it's during those weeks when she _knows_ that there is someone besides her who knows about her bisexuality that Rosa discovers that she's got real feeling hidden deep inside of herself. She sure knew it before, but she didn't like thinking about it.

But now, she's coming in contact with those feeling, those emotions. Sometimes, she'll just lay in bed in the darkness, thinking about generally everything and anything, but mostly about herself. And sometimes she really can't handle thinking about her feelings. She'll end up wanting to set fire to her own damn bed, and storm away to watch whatever TV show was on that late at night.

 _Everything is actually okay,_ Rosa tells herself as she comes into work. Charles won't tell anyone about her sexuality. He wouldn't do that. Not on purpose, anyways. _Stop overreacting._

And sometimes she'll put a thumb on her wrist to make sure that her heart was still beating; that her blood was still rushing. To make sure that she was alive. To reassure herself that she was really alive, and that she really existed.

The world was now in this different perspective for her. Knowing that she was bi, knowing that _someone_ else knew that she was bi changed everything for her. The rules of the game had been altered completely. Rosa Diaz was a bisexual Latina woman, and she was proud to own it.

But Charles would look at her knowingly sometimes, and it was at moments like those in which Rosa wouldn't know exactly what to think of herself anymore.

She doesn't even understand how it had happened; how Charles suddenly knew that she was bisexual after they had stayed at that one Boyle cousin's place. Rosa knew about the time that Charles had supposedly been in love with her, and she had told him that she had a boyfriend.

She had lied, obviously. She was dating a woman.

And that time after she and Marcus broke up, when Jake wanted to get closer to her as friends and had asked for her new boyfriend's name.

It was Carmen. And she was a woman.

So Rosa is sitting at her desk with her pen in her hand, staring straight ahead at her computer screen. Captain Holt seems to notice that she's distracted, so he calls her into her office to ask if everything's all right.

Rosa's heart has leapt into her throat. If there was anyone at this precinct who could understand what she was going through, it was Captain Holt. She finds herself seriously thinking about just blurting out "I'm bisexual" when he asks about her wellbeing, but decides against it and answers with a "I've just got a lot on my plate, but I'm all right."

"If you ever need anything, Detective Diaz, I am here for you. We are all here for you," Captain Holt tells her. Rosa gives him half of a smile and walks back to her desk.

Charles is acting overly-friendly, and it's started to get on Rosa's nerves. _Set fire to my own damn mind,_ she thinks, every time he talks. Because every single time that Charles talks, Rosa's mind is constantly emerged in fear because _what if he accidentally says something??_

She hates fear. She hates everything about fear. Living in fear isn't living at all. Rosa wants to truly let go and be able to just lock up all of her fear in a small box and then throw it in front of a passing train.

So she makes one of the most abrupt and toughest decisions of her entire life. She decides to truly rock the boat and tell _everyone_ that she is bisexual, and there is nothing that anyone can do to change that.

Rosa stands up and clears her throat the next morning in the briefing room. As her truth flows from her mouth, Rosa feels a weight being lifted from her shoulders. She feels lighter. She feels happier. Rosa mindlessly puts her hand around her other wrist and feels her pulse.

Her heart is beating fast. She's truly alive. There's no fear anymore, and it's one of the best feeling that Rosa's ever had in a long time. Rosa takes a deep breath in the moment, sucking in air and releasing it. It feels good to finally be able to breathe. After all she's been through, it's been worth it to get here.

And she really doesn't care about the repercussions.

After that, everything changes for Rosa. She's being supported and lifted up. There is an overwhelming amount of love in the precinct. Rosa finds herself no hating it. Maybe emotions really are alright. And somehow, her point of view is her's again. She is Rosa Diaz. She is a strong, badass, independent woman. No matter what. She out and proud to own herself as bisexual, and there's no way in hell that she's ashamed.

She's not tired of the world anymore. She's glad to be living, and she's glad to be where she is. She's left all of the inhibitions behind, and Rosa Diaz is proud of herself for that.

Because love and friendship and joy really make being alive worth it. Rosa would've never imagined that she's have so much joy. She would've never thought that her coworkers would become her family, and she was so happy that they had.

Jake was the brother that she had never had. Amy was the wonderful little sister. Charles was… definitely the strange but well wishing cousin. And even though Rosa would never admit it out loud,  Captain Holt and Sarge were definitely their dads. And Gina…

Rosa was _so_ in love with her.

**Author's Note:**

> comments/kudos appreciated!!


End file.
